Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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