Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I'm both gender and math confused
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
