Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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