Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Randomize
