The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I just found puke in my bra..
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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