I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize