Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
