Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
