im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
