the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
