Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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