I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
