STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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