ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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