I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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