I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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