you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
