come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
