well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
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