I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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