bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
