happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
