i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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