Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
