Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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