Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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