i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Sober January is a disaster.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
