Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize
