I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
