just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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