your thong is hanging out like whoa
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
