i don't like sucking hair
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
