I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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