If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
