so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
