I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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