so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
