She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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