ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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