i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
