8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Randomize
