Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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