do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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