i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
