u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Randomize
