tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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