Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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