He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
