Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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