I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
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